When the World Makes You Feel Unlovable

But You Know You’re Not

Have you ever had that ache in your chest, the one that whispers, “Something must be wrong with me…” even though, deep down, a quieter voice is saying, “No. I know I’m lovable. I just haven’t been loved the way I need to be yet.”

Yeah. That feeling. I think lots of us have that feeling at one time or another. The feeling of being too much and not enough, at the exact same time.

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There are days when it feels like no one gets you.

You're too much.
You're not enough.
You're too sensitive.
You're too emotional.
You're too quiet.
You're too loud.
You're too weird.
You're too deep.
You're too soft.

And after a while… you start to wonder: “Maybe I really am too much.” Or worse, “Maybe I really am unlovable.”

But here’s what I’ve learned after a lifetime of talking to Spirit, hearing the hearts of my clients and from strangers, and walking through my own healing:

You’re not unlovable, you’ve just been in the wrong rooms. You’ve been with people who forgot how to love. That’s not because of you or because there’s something wrong with you. You’ve been with people who only knew how to survive. With people who were never taught how to see someone like you. Just because they don’t know how to love you doesn’t mean that you are unlovable.

The truth is: You were never meant to shrink to be accepted. You were meant to be remembered by the ones who recognize your light.

And those people? They will feel like home.
Not because they complete you, but because they remind you: You were whole all along.

“You’re not unlovable. You’ve just been in places, with people, families, in relationships, and in environments that were unequipped to meet your magic.”

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You are not the problem!

But sometimes it feels like you are and I get that.

When you’re left out of the group chat. When you’re too quiet, too intense, too sensitive, too joyful, too spiritual, too “weird.” When the people who were supposed to love you didn’t, or couldn’t. When it’s easier to shrink than to shine. When your voice wasn’t being heard. When you were ghosted. When you were picked.

Over time, these small actions (or inactions) and micro-messages from the world can start to become our belief system:

“I must be the common denominator.”
“No one really gets me.”
“Maybe if I was different, I’d be chosen.”

But here’s the spiritual truth:
✨ Your people can’t find you when you’re hiding from the world.
✨ And hiding from the world doesn’t protect you. It isolates and starves you.

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So what do you do when you feel unlovable… even though you know you’re not?

You come home to the one who always loved you.

You stop asking for crumbs and go where there’s an abundance of love and respect for you. You leave the rooms that don’t see you and build your own room full of love and kindness. You stop shrinking to be easier for people who were never meant for your truth. You make different decisions. You surround yourself with people who see you, even if they’re strangers. You start to use your voice and stand up for yourself.

You remember that there’s a difference between being alone and being abandoned. You remind your little me inside of you that you’re there for them even if the world has left them behind. They can always count on you.

One is a choice. The other is a wound.
You get to choose yourself now.

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Today’s Homework for Paid Subscribers 👇

Rewriting the Lovable conversations we have with ourselves

To explore this heal this part of you, paid subscribers receive the following homework:

1. Journaling prompts

2. Reminder of affirmations that you’re lovable

3. A guided mirror work ritual

4. Affirmations to remind yourself that you are truly lovable